Misandry Review » Marty Nemko http://www.misandryreview.com News and views by bloggers opposed to misandry -- the teaching of contempt for males in popular culture Thu, 02 Sep 2010 16:36:24 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 Leadership and Management Lessons in Directing a Play http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/08/02/leadership-and-management-lessons-in-directing-a-play/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/08/02/leadership-and-management-lessons-in-directing-a-play/#comments Mon, 02 Aug 2010 20:33:00 +0000 Marty Nemko Directing plays offers me an opportunity to use every bit of my leadership and management skills. That's because the same emotionality that enables actors to do so well on stage can make them a challenge offstage. And the artiste personalities of some of my designers provide similar challenges.

Here are some things I've done to make the play I'm currently directing, Neil Simon's, Broadway Bound (which has two weeks left in its run) to be a success--standing ovation, fine reviews.

My cast and crew get little or no pay, so they must be otherwise inspired to work hard. To that end, I pointed out that community theatre is among the only recreations aimed at older people, and that our audiences are really excited to come see us perform. I explained that our theatre is an ideal one for older people: Because it only seats 100 and has perfect acoustics and sight lines, even the elderly can easily see and hear everything. I also explained that the theatre gave me the opportunity to direct whatever play I wanted and that Broadway Bound was my choice because it has the rare combination of great humor, deep poignancy, food for thought, and yet is fully understandable by mainstream audiences. I also, throughout the rehearsal process, looked for all legitimate opportunities to praise cast and crew and I bent over backwards to accommodate to their every request. I wanted them to know that if I'm to ask them to work hard, I need to work at least as hard.

Especially when dealing with a mainly volunteer cast and crew, I must keep in mind that each person has only so much energy to give to the production before s/he runs out of gas. Each cast and crew member has a different-sized fuel tank and gets different miles per gallon. And there's no gas station, so when a person runs out of gas, s/he stops. So, unlike the standard management advice to treat everyone equally, before asking something of a cast or crew member, I assess whether it's worth the gas that person is likely to expend. And in, general, as I decide what tasks to assign, I'm considering whether the task will get the production sufficient miles per gallon, sufficient benefit to the production, to justify the energy that would be expended.

So, for example, I believe insufficient benefit derives from the standard practice of having all-day rehearsals on the Saturday and Sunday before the play opens. So I held rehearsal only on Saturday. Another example: I have a crew member who loves to clean--if he had his way, he'd spend endless hours cleaning the theatre, but many of those tasks won't yield maximum audience benefit for the time that would be expended. So to explain that to him without offending him, I said, "I look forward to your doing those tasks. They'll be of real benefit to the theatre but for now, I need you to focus on getting the right props and furniture for the set. After that's done, if there's still time, it will be great for you to focus on sprucing up the theatre."

Staying with that car metaphor, if I'm to get maximum gas mileage out of my cast and crew, I must keep them tuned up. I do that, for example, by, as I said, looking for legitimate opportunities to praise them, and offering suggestions with maximum tact. (Candidly, I blew it one time, really laid into someone, and feel bad about that.) If necessary, I offer a low-key pep talk. For example, I might say, "Yes, I'm being pretty perfectionistic in offering you these suggestions but I believe we have the potential to create a truly memorable production here. I do want to reassure you that I fully realize that none of us, least of all me, can be perfect, so when mistakes happen, I'll probably never get mad. I'll just see if we can fix them and if not, I'll simply shrug my shoulders and move on."

Do you see any lessons in the above that could be applied to your work in managing people?
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/08/02/leadership-and-management-lessons-in-directing-a-play/feed/ 0 A Community Theatre Director’s Checklist http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/31/a-community-theatre-directors-checklist/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/31/a-community-theatre-directors-checklist/#comments Sat, 31 Jul 2010 21:38:00 +0000 Marty Nemko I have been asked to contribute my checklist for directing plays to the 11th edition of Stage Management. Here it is.

By the way, three weekends remain in the run of the wonderful play I'm directing, Neil Simon's Broadway Bound at Chanticleers Theatre, in Castro Valley, CA. I also play 1940s and ragtime songs on the piano during the half hour before the show. Tickets are at www.chanticleers.org.

Directing a Community Theatre Play

The checklist I use

Of course, I'd vary these, depending on the theatre, play, cast and crew, etc.

1 year before opening

Pick the play YOU want to direct. Find a theatre company willing to let you direct it.

Cast a wide net to recruit the best possible cast and crew. Good people are hard to find--especially in community theatre, where cast and crew usually are paid little or nothing.

Four months out

Read the script a number of times.

Meet with set designer. Have a ground plan ready for the production meeting

Scan the script into an editable Microsoft Word file and add a draft of the blocking and business. (Use the ground plan and little toy soldiers or chess pieces to help you envision it.)

Three months out

Hold auditions. Make casting decisions both on acting ability and how easy they are to work with, whether they contribute or detract from esprit de corps. Before casting someone, call directors they've acted for. Require casted actors to get offbook by the first rehearsal. That enables the rehearsals to focus on creating great theatre, not memorizing lines. Most actors will still need line calling but it will be minimized. Their having received the scripts with the first-draft blocking will help them get offbook.

Email the tentative schedule, of course, noting all actor, stage manager, and director conflicts.

Two months out

Hold your first production meeting. Make your artistic vision clear to your set, costume, lighting, and sound designers, and prop master. Include the theatre's artistic director.

Meet with your public relations person. Identify angles to use with the media.

Meet with your group sales person. These are critical to filling houses. Include pitching organizations serving low-income people for free tickets to the preview performance.

Six weeks out

Hold first rehearsal. Establish your rules (Mine are rehearsals start on time, the schedule is subject to change, input is very welcome, the draft blocking is cast not in stone but jello, most notes are communicated by email, and unless an actor objects, I may send actors notes during the run.) Rather than having them do an in-the-chair readthrough, I have them read while walking the draft blocking. After that first rehearsal, have a bonding party.

Get the cast solid on lines, blocking, and business as soon as possible.

Retain a videographer to make the trailer and to record a performance for the cast and crew to have as a souvenir and the theatre's archive.

Four to five weeks out

Work the scenes. Each rehearsal focuses on two or three scenes, each usually worked three times. Catch them doing something good: When I see something I like, without stopping them, I say "Good" or "keep it." If it's something I don't like and I can say it in a pleasant word or two, I may do so. But most notes are communicated via email when I get home from rehearsal.

Coach actors one-on-one, as needed.

Meet again with production staff to get progress reports and provide feedback. Meet with set builder to gain final agreement on the plan.

Write copy for the website, show program, third-party ticket sellers, etc. Get it approval by the PR person.

Meet with propmaster to decide on how to decorate the lobby. Get headshots from actors.

Two to three weeks out

Dress the set. (furniture, walls, floors)

Costume parade, publicity photo shoot, trailer shoot.

Post trailer on the theatre's site, third-party ticket seller sites, facebook, youtube, and twitter.

Introduce and revise props, ensure their efficient placement.

Run acts and then the full play. Focus on pacing and acting issues.

One week out

Cue-to-cue with sound and light operator.

Tech Saturday: Full runthrough with tech, no stopping if possible. Notes. Pizza/salad, then another full runthrough with tech, no stopping. (Costumes optional.)

Dress rehearsals.

Preview performance.

Opening night.

The 2nd-to-last performance

Record the performance to create the souvenir/archival DVD.

Final performance

Cast/crew strike party.

Dr. Nemko is a director and President of the Board of Chanticleers Theatre, Castro Valley, CA. www.chanticleers.org.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/31/a-community-theatre-directors-checklist/feed/ 0 The Trailer for the Play I’m Directing http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/07/the-trailer-for-the-play-im-directing/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/07/the-trailer-for-the-play-im-directing/#comments Thu, 08 Jul 2010 07:43:00 +0000 Marty Nemko Sorry the lighting is dark, but here is the trailer for the play I'm directing.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/07/the-trailer-for-the-play-im-directing/feed/ 0 Come see the play I’m directing: "The best play of the ’80s." http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/come-see-the-play-im-directing-the-best-play-of-the-80s/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/come-see-the-play-im-directing-the-best-play-of-the-80s/#comments Sat, 03 Jul 2010 21:50:00 +0000 Marty Nemko I am directing a play that I believe will provide a remarkable experience for all who attend. It's arguably Neil Simon's best play, Broadway Bound. Time magazine called it, "The Best Play of the 1980s." It's funny, touching, and offers food for thought on how to live your life.

In addition, this production, which runs from July 23-Aug. 15, features a multi-award-winning cast. And, at the risk of tooting my own horn, the previous play I directed at this theatre won Goldstar's Roar of The Crowd Award as the San Francisco Bay Area's #1 audience-favorite entertainment.

Speaking of the theatre, the play is being performed in an intimate setting (98 seats,) in which everyone has a great seat. And it's not even expensive: just $18 adults, $15 for students and people 55+.

If you live in the San Francisco Bay Area, I'd encourage you to come see it. I do believe that some performances may sell out, so it's wise to buy your tickets now: Here's the link for information and tickets.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/come-see-the-play-im-directing-the-best-play-of-the-80s/feed/ 0 A Moment of Patriotism http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/a-moment-of-patriotism/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/a-moment-of-patriotism/#comments Sat, 03 Jul 2010 21:33:00 +0000 Marty Nemko I'm hardly an American patriot. Indeed, I don't believe in patriotism: We should take pride in that which we have created, not an accident of where we're born or moved to. Too, I feel as much solidarity with a person from Ouagadougou as I do with someone from Oakland, where I live.

Yet in preparing for my KGO radio show tomorrow (July 4,) in which I'll start each segment playing a piece of patriotic music on my portable piano, I came across this version of God Bless the USA by an American Idol contestant and I was somehow moved to tears. Irrational but real.

So as we approach Independence Day, perhaps you too will find it moving.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/a-moment-of-patriotism/feed/ 0 Advice to the parent of an Ivy-aspiring kid http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/advice-to-the-parent-of-an-ivy-aspiring-kid/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/advice-to-the-parent-of-an-ivy-aspiring-kid/#comments Sat, 03 Jul 2010 20:51:00 +0000 Marty Nemko I often get inquiries from prospective clients, which in essence say, "Get my kid into a prestigious college."

Here's how I responded today to one of those queries:

The path of least resistance: Let her be her designer-label self--get into the most prestigious college she can but you be very savvy about filling out the financial aid forms. Use this great book. She'll probably get as good a deal from the Ivy as from MegaState U--the prestigious privates have beaucoup bucks. Negotiate hard with those villains.

I haven't found many kids who say "I've worked so hard to get into a prestigious college" be open to often smarter options such as deferring college for a year or 40, doing interesting things in the real world. Then, if needed, she can return to college. Girls are especially likely to be enamored of the straight-to-college plan, which iss erroneously perceived to be the low-risk approach. Most high-achieving girls also love the structure of school. Alas, too often, those choices are not in the kid's best developmental interest let alone long-term career interest.

Parents too are subject to the "I'll do anything for my wonderful kid" mindset-- "How could I deny her Ivy when she's worked so hard?" It's fallacious thinking but pervasive and nearly impossible to dissuade from.

Where I can, without too much resistance, add value is helping her choose a career, teach he how to maximize her chances of achieving career success, and importantly, teach her how to make the most of college. Colleges don't want to tell you how, because if more students used these techniques (e.g., get course credit for customized one-on-one courses) it would cut into universities' profit.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/advice-to-the-parent-of-an-ivy-aspiring-kid/feed/ 0 Today’s Anti-Boy Schools Are Unfair Even to Gifted Kids http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/todays-anti-boy-schools-are-unfair-even-to-gifted-kids/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/todays-anti-boy-schools-are-unfair-even-to-gifted-kids/#comments Sat, 03 Jul 2010 19:54:00 +0000 Marty Nemko Here's a report from Christina Hoff Sommers of the American Enterprise Institute on how boys are being manipulated out of programs for the gifted.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/03/todays-anti-boy-schools-are-unfair-even-to-gifted-kids/feed/ 0 Important Note to My Readers http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/02/important-note-to-my-readers/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/02/important-note-to-my-readers/#comments Fri, 02 Jul 2010 22:16:00 +0000 Marty Nemko Because of a technical glitch, all subscriptions to this blog have been deleted. So, if you'd like to get my blog posts emailed to you, just enter your email address in the "Subscribe" box on my blog: www.martynemko.blogspot.com.

By the way, I do not sell or give away any email addresses to anyone. And your subscribing is completely confidential.

Of course, thank you for your continued interest in my ideas.
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/02/important-note-to-my-readers/feed/ 0 Career Counseling Reinvented http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/01/career-counseling-reinvented/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/01/career-counseling-reinvented/#comments Fri, 02 Jul 2010 00:14:00 +0000 Marty Nemko Many people are disappointed with career counselors: Clients too often fail to identify a career goal and/or to land a good job. Here's why:

To help clients pick a career, career counselors help them identify their skills, interests, and values. Unfortunately, that too often results in too few or too many career possibilities, an ostensibly good-fit career that turns out not to be, an ostensibly poor-fit career that works out fine, or a career with lottery odds: You like performing and look great, so you want to be a movie star. Good luck.

To help people land a specific job, career counselors guide (or too often write) resumes, cover letters, and urge networking and cold contacting employers. Those strategies too often fail because the pool of people who use career counselors, disproportionately have weak networks, are lousy networkers and/or are too shy or not-quick-on-their-feet enough to successfully cold contact employers.

Another problem with the career counseling profession is that I believe it is unethical for career counselors to write or heavily edit resumes and cover letters and teach clients how to hide their weaknesses. Unless the candidate is truly worthy of the position (and if they were top-drawer, they're less likely to need a career counselor,) the employer will thereby be saddled with an employee inferior to the one s/he'd otherwise hire. That not only makes life difficult for the employer and the coworkers, it's unfair to the superior candidate who lost out because he didn't use a hired gun to make the candidate look better than he is in real life. And ultimately, that's unfair to society because hiring the not-best candidate results in worse goods and services for all of us.

Thus the field of career counseling is ripe for reinvention. Here are things career counselors could do that would yield a far higher rate of success while being completely ethical:

1. Because it's so tough for the typical person who sees a career counselor to change to a more rewarding career, especially in this tough job market, help clients make the most of their current job: Renegotiate their job description to match their strengths and minimize their weaknesses, learn how to get along better with their boss and/or change their boss, improve their skills (technical, communication, whatever,) manage their supervisees better, and even incorporate their creative side into their work (e.g., for some clients, I play an improvisation on the piano with the client as the trigger for my improvisation--It actually helps gets some clients unstuck.)

2. Because non-stars are having a hard time landing decent jobs, show clients low-risk/high-payoff self-employment ideas and tactics. The problem is, most career counselors are not great businesspeople so they may not be the best teachers of entrepreneurship.

3. Help clients replace their anger at incompetent bosses, coworkers, and poorly run places of employment with a wiser, more circumspect approach: gratitude that the client has genetic and environment-caused gifts that make her superior, the perspective to realize how important or not important certain decisions are, a recognition of one's own limitations, the empowerment to leave a place of employment that is unethical and/or treats that person poorly.

4. Help people improve: procrastinate less, manage their anger, communicate better, manage their time better. A less obvious example: educate clients on the dangers of being a dabbler, a generalist. It's fun to dabble but, except at low levels of employment, success usually requires depth of expertise, which usually requires years. That's the core contention of Malcolm Gladwell's book, Outliers, and something I've found to be true, except for truly brilliant people, who become expert quickly.

5. In helping people land jobs, teach them how to use the internet to find truly well-suited job openings and then use a two-column cover letter to demonstrate that good fit: On the left side, list the main requirements listed in the job ad and on the right side, convincingly explain how you meet the requirement. Note that this is ethically solid: you're simply helping to match an employee with an appropriate employer. That stands in contrast to career counselors who write people's resumes and cover letters and do interview coaching, which often make a prospect look better than s/he really is.

6. Help the client develop a philosophy for living. For example, mine is that the life well-led is not about balance, nor about happiness, nor about material acquisition beyond a bare middle-class living. I believe balance is overrated. The life well-led is about being as productive as possible, while being kind where possible, tough where necessary. To avoid long work weeks burning you out, work slow and steady, and where possible, do tasks that are relatively easy for you and in the field you've taken the time to become an expert in.

Dear readers, your thoughts?
]]> http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/07/01/career-counseling-reinvented/feed/ 0 The Latest Example of Reverse Discrimination http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/06/25/the-latest-example-of-reverse-discrimination/ http://www.misandryreview.com/marty-nemko/2010/06/25/the-latest-example-of-reverse-discrimination/#comments Sat, 26 Jun 2010 02:52:00 +0000 Marty Nemko I continue to shake my head. What are we doing?!

Today, a client who is a communications director for a prominent nonprofit told me this story. (This is a pretty close paraphrase:)

"We have three communications directors. One slot is reserved for minorities. So we hire this Latino guy. It turns out he has a Latino-sounding name but really, he's Russian. He turns out to be a total failure but we end up having to keep him because we had had to get rid of another minority manager six months ago and our organization's Diversity Committee would give us hell if we fired him. So we hired someone to train him, which cost us (and ultimately the sick people we're trying to serve) a fortune. After a year, we gave up. It was hopeless and we fired him and his trainer. Now we're looking for another person of color."

I am aware that this story would be so much more credible if I could list names and the organization but there's no way I'd even ask my client for permission. He'd lose his job faster than you can say General McChrystal. Of course, the only reason I get to hear these stories is that the client-counselor relationship guarantees confidentiality.

Please, dear reader, where possible, think in terms of the largest perspective: Ask yourself whether reverse discrimination is a net positive or a net negative:
  • in terms of the quality of the goods and services we receive
  • with regard to the injustice of more competent people not getting hired or promoted because they are of the wrong ethnic group
  • in light of the prejudice that fully qualified minorities face because we know that many positions are filled as the result of reverse discrimination. Be honest with yourself: When you, for example, see a Black physician or that a Latino student was admitted to UCLA, do you not think they well might have not been selected if it weren't for their ethnicity and perhaps pushed through, and/or had low grades, and thus are likely to be less competent?
  • And perhaps most lofty, ask yourself whether, in terms of the great universal principles of justice, in 2010, after 50 years of affirmative action, 145 years since slavery ended, in light of some minorities (Asians) doing well despite no reverse discrimination, is yet more years of reverse discrimination cosmically right?
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